Stationary Drifting


Small Things Project: Day 43 to 49

[warning: this post is a little disjointed because it happens over a 5 month span. There are no pictures and frankly I’m just posting it so I can start anew]

Day 43: (april 8)

Today I’m happy for my easter gift to myself, fancy new nail polish in spring colours, and M’s gift of lunch. And Sil’s gift of a few hours doing laundry by myself in her quiet apartment with her lovely and loving cat.

I’m happy that I came home to a tidied up apartment and dinner on the stove. My fiance is so great.

I’m happy for the grey, spring Sunday light that made everything feel in slow motion. I love slow motion sundays.

I’m happy that I got to sleep in, and that I took the weekend off from the gym but that I’m excited to get back to it tomorrow. Operation get healthy is still in effect. I was too hungover yesterday from Friday night to start my cleanse but I’m getting to it tomorrow. And I’m excited for that too.

Day 44: (april 9)

Today I’m happy that M & I got our health nut lifestyle on and went to the gym for a spinning class. I’m happy that we are really on the same page about this. We even worked out for another 45mins after spinning for an hour. The best part was when I was slowing down in class and sweating my life away and M looked over at me and told me that I could do it. Having a gym buddy is really great.

I’m happy that we got a bunch of good foods at the market and now, as I drink my cleanse tea (which is so far going great), M is preparing us a really good smelling lunch. I’m telling ya, spring is the time for resolutions. M is even quitting smoking!

Today I’m also very excited about my writing more for my brother’s magazine. Check out my Field of View post or the website to see more.

Day 45: (may 10)

Phew, a whole month went by, I don’t know what happened…But I’m back at it! So today I’m happy for not beating myself up about small things and for not giving up. I’m happy for allowing myself to enjoy my routines in their own time and to allow myself to prioritize as needed.

I’m still glowing from my long walk with Josie yesterday and for knocking a bunch of chores off my list of things to do. Today I’m happy for my coffee, the fact that I’m still working towards feeling healthier, and a full day of work ahead of me. I’m also really really grateful for all the great friends and family who have offered so many ways of helping with this wedding planning. I’m so lucky to have these amazing people in my life.

Day 45: (may 15)

Today I’m happy for all the love and support we enjoyed at last night’s fundraiser. I’m grateful to Mars for cooking up a storm and for everyone that came and ate soul food, enjoyed the beautiful evening with us and donated towards our marriage.

I’m happy for the quiet train ride to snooze and reflect. I’m excited to be in the states again an am looking forward to eating a cheesesteak!

I’m looking forward to being done traveling for the day and for getting shit done tomorrow.

Day 46: (aug 9)

Today I am happy to get back to my blog. Too long, WAY too long since my last post.

As much as I was annoyed have having to stay home and wait for the Internet guy today (it’s been out for 2days) I was happy to spend some time in the kitchen. It’s been such a hot summer and I’ve been so distracted that I haven’t really cooked in ages. I made bread (from this recipe), banana bread (from here), an extremely spicy fried rice and some extremely spicy spiced tea. M said I was a spicy lady today, which was probably my inadvertent desire to burn the exhaustion out of me (I suspect it’s due to germs). On a side note: I experienced my first chili on skin burn today and yow did it hurt. After trying a few Internet suggestions I finally succumbed to M’s suggestion and sat for almost an hour with my hand in a bowl of iced milk. It still stings under my thumb nail but its so much better than it was I’m not complaining. The burn set in just as the Internet guy arrived, I think he probably thought I was insane as I kept disappearing to the bathroom to wash my hands, and at one point cut a lime in half and took it to the bathroom (where I squeezed it on my hand).

I’m happy for the cooler day today. It’s been a really hot summer, consistently hovering at 30 so that only my heartiest plants (the chilies and the Mediterranean rosemary and lavender) are still doing okay. I’m sad for my lost strawberries just as they were strawb’ing. The cool-ish weather and rain today was most appreciated.

I’m happy that my grant proposal is written and ready to be sent, and that my summer internship is drawing to a close. I am once again redoubling my thesis efforts. I really want to be done before I’m 30 but would settle for before the end of 2012 if I must, either way that requires writing though so I’m going to be off to the library and other quiet places lots in the next weeks.

Day 47: (aug 10)

Today I am glad for rainy, cool, grey, quiet afternoons. I’m happy for some solid perspective in the form of a presentation by a fierce lady named Kim Pate about Prisoner Justice for women. I’m happy for a new blog to read (hey there the stork and the beanstalk, you’re very cute). I’m happy for some quiet dinner and reading and for the fact that M is throwing a really great party tonight for 2-qtpoc.

Day 48: (aug 11)

Today I’m happy for a successful and SO full Transformative Justice workshop. Everyone was so inspiring and awesome. We worked through some really heavy things and although we didn’t come to any definitive conclusions I certainly came away with a sense of community interest and support.

I’m happy for tea with a sweet friend post workshop where we talked about life stuff. I feel like I should have taken a different path and become a counselor….

I’m happy for a job interview at an interesting organization. I’ve been to SO many job interviews in the past while that I don’t have my hopes up but I was happy to have gotten a call back, I wasn’t expecting one.

I’m thankful for a quiet night at home. This week has been epic. To say the least.

Day 49: (aug 13)

Today I’m happy for it being the last day of work so I can focus on writing for the rest of the month.

I’m happy that my best buddy is home and available for hang outs again. It’s been a minute too long that he was away.

Mostly I’m proud of myself for mcguyvering the bathtub with a ton of baking soda, vinegar and a plunger and finally getting it to drain properly. It look me a while and spot a small amount of frustration but I didn’t break and go get drano, which makes me super happy! No harsh chemicals for me or M!!


spring cleanse: days 1-3

I’m just going to do this like my small things project because frankly I can’t think of another way to do it right now. All I want is chocolate.

Day 1:

I started the cleanse today. I was doing really good too, drinking my teas, avoiding bread and dairy. I went to the gym. I talked it out with Marseau, we made a late (late) lunch and as soon as we were done BAM I wanted sugar really really badly. I rarely crave sugar anymore, mostly because I have been baking a lot, but I  really think that this will be the hardest part.

So far I’m not feeling anything else that’s all that different or hard. I feel surprisingly pretty energized given that I haven’t had any coffee today, everything else is going pretty well. I’m hungry but I don’t know if that’s because I worked out or because I haven’t had my usual filling wheat flour. 2 weeks feels like a really really long time from here. I hope that I get some good results to keep me going.

Day 2:

I woke up feeling crappy. I don’t know if its because I’ve been sleeping badly or because of the cleanse but I feel like I have a cold coming on. I think its because of the cleanse though, I’ve heard that people generally feel shitty the first few days. If that’s true I’m definitely on schedule. Could possibly be from the fact that I quit smoking cold turkey too.

Also, I’m hungry. I gotta do some research of what I can eat because I need some good snacks that fit within these stupid restrictions.

I miss coffee and I miss sweet things. A lot. I still think about it all the time. Which is weird because I don’t think I ate really all that much sugar in my daily life but for some reason the fact that I can’t succumb to a craving is making me want it very intensely.

Nothing all that great to report today. I went to the gym and did my workout, but I didn’t feel energized like I usually do. I just feel tired, cranky, and a shitty. Things better look up soon or I’m going to go back to sugar. This is no trade.

Day 3:

I still feel shitty but definitely less shitty than yesterday. The cold symptoms are still gone and I’m not craving sugar quite so much. I’m just missing caffeine and am feeling a bit slow.

I’m starting to get angry at the cleanse though and how its blocking me from having all the delicious foods that I like eating. I considered quitting it this coming weekend when Marseau and Mood started planning a soul food night (how can I live without the cheese

smoothie for my sugar cravings, tea for my herbal stuff (I think that this is the dandelion root one)

biscuits and breaded chicken?). I’m still planning on seeing it through but I’m annoyed.

I’m less hungry though, or at least I’m starting to fill satisfied with the food I am eating and can feel decent after a big meal, not still hungry. I think that this means that usually I eat a lot of carbs to fill me up. I know that I’m not supposed to have gluten but I’ve kind of cut out most carbs (minus granola) for the moment. I’m going to look for rice crackers and maybe corn chips soon though for snacking. Must also get apples


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Eating: Peanut Butter & Chocolate Ganache Bars

I have one helluva sweet tooth. I don’t know if I’ve mentioned that yet. Don’t let the nice bread and humus recipes fool you. I would live off baked goods if I could manage it. Anything with chocolate, whipped cream/icing, and cupcakes is a-okay by me. I’m the person who reads the desert menu first when I get to a restaurant, meals are often means to a (desert) ends. I love eating and good food of all kinds but give me a dense, sweet baked good any day. Just ask my parents, I could put away a box of chocolates in an hour without getting sick. I can still do that now, I just try harder not to.

Case in point. I made this chipotle flourless chocolate cake twice last week (which I found over at the Kitchen Sink). Once for Felicia’s 30th birthday party. It was a hit there by the way, gone before I could take a picture. And once just for me and M, where it was also gone in about a day before I could take a picture again. It’s really really good, especially warm out of the oven. I highly suggest taking the recipe makers advice and getting good ingredients because there are so few of them. I used a block of semi-sweet calibault chocolate (again, I love living near Little Italy). I couldn’t find chipolte up here, which I found weird. So I used regular chili, which was still good. The sweetness of the cake coupled with the burn of the spices is incredible.

I also made these Peanut Butter Brownies, from Smitten Kitchen the other week around the time of the soul food night. I’ve been have a lot of late night baking urges recently and this was one of those times. I was surprised how easy making ganache is. Its the perfect top to contrast the salty peanut butter bottom. They lasted a bit longer than the cake and made excellent evening snacks for a little while.

This baked up super fast. Though I think I over cooked it a little bit (my oven runs hot) because it was a little dry-er than I hoped. Its good enough to put in rotation in the baked goods tupperwear though. I took it to my friends’ for dinner and they fought over who got the bigger piece.

Off to get more butter for more baking.

First attempt at Bread!

First Attempt at Bread!!

It worked! My glass pan shattered when I warmed it up (luckily not with the bread in it), which was sad and very scary when it exploded in my face. So I baked it in my cast iron pan with a lid over it. Its not as tall as I had hoped but its very delicious. Homemade bread from now on! Must buy more flour….

Here’s the recipe, its so easy. (I let mine rise almost 24hours).

Artisan bread 

3 cups of white flour
1/4 teaspoon of yeast
1 1/4 teasons of salt
1 1/3 cups of water

Mix the flour, salt, and yeast in bowl. Add the water and mix with a spoon for less than a minute until you get a sticky and lumpy ball of dough. Add a touch of water if it’s too dry. Cover the bowl and let it sit in a warm place for at least 12 hours of rising (I tried 24 hours and…well, you’ll have to try yourself, but you won’t be disappointed). That’s right. Just leave it. Don’t knead it. The little fermenting bubbles will do all the work for you.

After the initial rise, scoop the dough onto a heavily floured piece of parchment paper (having the paper on a tray makes it easier to move). Pull the edges of the ball so they fold over the top and meet in the middle. You’ll do this 4 or 5 times so that all the seams of dough are on the top. Now flip the floury ball over so the seams are hidden (flour on the hands also helps).

Preheat your oven from 425-475 degrees F with one of those inside. The lower temp gives a softer tan coloured crust while 475 gives a crisp and chocolaty crust.

After the loaf has risen for about an hour, grab the four corners of the parchment and gently transfer the loaf and parchment to the preheated casrole dish with a lid ( the round white ceramic dishes with the blue flowers work great, I think it’s called corning wear)  and slide it into the oven for 30 min with a lid and then 15 minutes without.  Eat fresh or  cooling on a rack for an hour does help you to get the biggest bubbles.

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